How to Proactively Manage Conflict as an Employee

Defining conflict

When you name it, you can fix it.

Reasons behind conflict

1. Indifference – not working as hard as they should
2. Tension – negative vibe in a meeting due to lack of trust
3. Struggle – roadblocks
4. Hostility – someone has it out for you at work

Conflict vs. Bullying

Conflict
A disagreement where both sides respectfully express their views.

Bullying
Repeated, negative behavior by an individual, or group of people, who have power and control over another person.

Getting Help

• Confide in a boss, a peer, or an ally
• Speak to your HR department

Conflict and the need for outside intervention

Healthy Compromise
An end to the conflict that works in the long-term best interest of both parties.

Productive Solution
An emotionless process that creates the best path forward for the organization.

A productive solution may not feel as good as a healthy compromise, but what matters is that you move forward and focus on the work.

If you can’t arrive at a healthy compromise or a productive solution, it’s best to involve a mediator to help resolve the conflict.

What to do when a coworker checks out

Reasons why people check out

1. Self-doubt
2. Mistrust – burned by broken promises or ineffective leaders
3. Burnout – emotionally fatigue

All three or at the core of indifference.  You can find a healthy compromise or productive solution by expressing interest.

• Do you feel like you’re a respected and important member of the team?
• Do you trust that your work matters?
• Is there something I can take off your plate so you feel like you have the space to prioritize our project?

Attempt to connect with a checked-out coworker.

How to respectfully overcome a “no”

There’s a 50% chance that the hostility is not about you.

Dealing with a hospital coworker

1. Get to know them
2. Pay attention to how they communicate
3. Get advice from someone you trust

Make a sincere effort to understand others.

How to resolve individual and team tension

Tension is an indicator that something has gone wrong with a company’s culture.  

Addressing Tension

1. Watch for body language
2. Be intentional
3. Be clear on deliverables
4. Be your own mentor

How to avoid an endless struggle

Premortem
An exercise where you imagine how something will fail in the future, and you work backward to address those points of failure.

Review how something WILL fail and determine ways to overcome it.  It improves your chance of success by over 30%.  Imaging how something will fail in the future, and work backwards to address those individual points of failure before you start.

Managing conflict with your boss

Name and frame conflict

• Indifference
• Exhaustion
• Tension
• Poor culture
• Hostility
• Personal issues
• Work struggles

Display empathy and see your boss as a person.

Being a peer-leader in a chaotic environment

Chaos is not healthy.  Chaos is a mindset–and so is leadership. 

When conflict clashes with your values

• Am I proud of the work I’m doing?
• Do I have more good days than bad days?
• Do I look forward to returning to work and seeing my colleagues?
• Can I speak up about things I would like to change?

Well-Being Boot Camp

• Work ordinary hours
• Put away devices after work
• Spend time with family
• Cook nutritious meals
• Get 7-8 hours of sleep