Difficult Conversations: Talking about Race at Work

Difficult Conversations: Talking about Race at Work
Instructor: Kwame Christian
Released: 7/31/2020	Course Details 16m General
Skills Covered Diversity & Inclusion Cultural Competency		Course Link
Professional Certifications and Continuing Education Units (CEUs) Project Management Institute – PDUs: 0.25 hour
People around the world are having difficult conversations about race and justice. But few are talking about how to talk about race. This has left some professionals sitting on the sidelines because they don’t know what to say or how to say it. In this course, negotiation and conflict resolution expert Kwame Christian shows how to apply a useful framework to open up an effective dialogue at work and facilitate understanding. Kwame highlights the barriers that make talking about race so challenging. He then shares how to apply a framework that provides a consistent tool for how to have these conversations. Using this framework, you can acknowledge and validate emotions, use curiosity to open up dialogue, and work with others to determine what you’re trying to solve. Plus, Kwame shares general tips for talking about race, including how to avoid common pitfalls and talk to your kids about race and society. Source: LinkedIN Learning

Introduction

Talking about race at work

The best things in life are on the other side of difficult conversations.

In this course, we are blending the negotiation and conflict resolution skills with that civil rights background to create a course that helps you to have these difficult conversations about race.

What makes conversations about race so difficult?

Why are conversations about race so difficult?

Political reprisal
Social reprisal
The payoff is unclear

The alluring trap of intent

Give them the benefit of the doubt. Focus on actions and impact.

The Compassionate Curiosity Framework

Apply the compassionate curiosity framework

Acknowledge and validate emotions
Getting curious with compassion
Joint problem-solving

Acknowledge and validate emotions

Using a simple formula by saying “it sounds like” or “it seems like”. Acknowledge emotion by labeling. Validate by saying “that makes sense”.

Getting curious with compassion

Lead with “out of curiosity…” and lead with your question. Stick with open-ended questions. Use questions that start with Who, What, Where, and How. Notice we avoided the word why. That’s because the word why is often associated with judgment.

Joint problem-solving

Invite the other person in the process. It may feel like a brainstorming. Collaboration builds commitment. If they feel as though you forced the idea or solution onto them, then they’re going to resist and it makes it less likely for them to comply down the road.

Compassionate curiosity framework in action

Acknowledge and validate emotion
- “It seems as though you’re hesitant to commit to doing more, is that right?”. Then we listen, and then we hear a little bit more of the emotion. Then we say “ah, that makes sense.”
Ask open ended questions.
- “What is it that you want to accomplish as it relates to inclusivity within our organization?”
Joint problem-solving
- “What do you think it is that we can do as a company to make sure we are holding true to our commitment to diversity and inclusion?”

Things to Consider When Talking About Race

Winning your internal negotiation

Use the compassionate curiosity framework for internal negotiations as well.

Common mistakes to avoid when talking about race

It’s easy to get defensive
Vilifying the other side
Burning out

Create a system of unnatural responses

Talking to kids about race

Speak less than you listen. 70/30 rule. Speak only 30% of the time and listen 70% of the time. “How do you feel about this situation?” Open dialogue and an opportunity for you to listen. Use the compassionate curiosity framework for this conversation.